We have a bush that is a little over 2 feet out from our front window, about 18 ft. long and over 4ft wide. The master bedroom is upstairs and has a 3 foot overhang over this bush. I kept hearing noise down there and eventually saw someone disappear and not come out either end. This meant they were somewhere underneath where the upstairs level has the overhang. KRP was downstairs watching TV. I got dressed fast and headed downstairs. Downstairs I distictly hear someone along the wall where the large living room window is. I looked out and all be danged if someone was not out there looking back.
I grabbed my long mag light flash light and went out. Annie dog was banging at the front screen door and barking. As I looked between the bush and the wall there he was. WTF do I do now? Crap what the heck was I thinking. So in the nastiest voice I could muster I say “what are you doing there in my bushes?” No response. Louder “what the f#@k are you doing?” I get a mumble and then I realize this guy does not have any pants on! “WTF are you doing leaning on my wall and hiding in my bushes!!” The guy obviously caught with his pants down and trying to hide against the wall behind the bush says ” ugh umm nothing” I shine the light on him and he then says “I am ugh I am taking a shit”. At this point I have realized that he was not taking a dump as his is small little worm was a tad too large. Oh my God what do I do now? So I very loudly state “well you have about 5 seconds to get off my wall and out of there”. I then turn and boogie into the house saying to KRP load the gun while I get the dog.
I get back out there with my “flashlight” and he was long gone. No crap there either – like yeah that was what you were doing after peeping in our window.
So can you give us a discription?
Under 30 black male with his pants pulled down and his willy out?
Did you see which way he went?
No after I got back out with my flash light and dog he was gone.
Going to go buy draps to cover the faux wood shutter blinds we have – I put a sheet up for tonight.
Ok another day in hell.
webster
Never a dull moment in your ‘hood. Well, at least you don’t have to wash the window (!), or scoop up after him. What’s with the pervs that they have to take their pants all the way off, anyway? At this point he was probably harmless; you should have pointed the flashlight at him to get a good look, then focus on the little worm and chuckled. Yeah, I think curtains are in order. You’d be surprised what you can see through some of those blinds.
kmilyun
With the shade screens we purchased from the power company years ago and the blinds during the day you can not see in at all. At night apparently if the lights are on you can contort yourself to peep through the cracks. The DUH factor I guess. We just replaced our vertical blinds with these last year. Guess it was dumb d dumb dum . …
I asked for a review of the associations security tapes so maybe we will know for sure if he was peeping, pooping, entertaining himself, or scoping out the digs! Who knows what brings a grown man to hide with his pants down and his worm hanging out.
Karen
OMG. Where the heck do you live?!! Set mouse traps on the ground, in front of the window. They won’t hurt a peeper, but will scare him.
kmilyun
google south sac Iraq videos get an idea
Cranky
Jan – yikes! You handled this quite well, if you ask me. Got him out of there and with additional window coverings will make it less entertaining to peep. But, man, it would be unsettling to have that happened to me.
kmilyun
Cranky!!! Your Back!!!
and yeah no one slept much around here last night.
Bibliotekaren
Acckkk!! Do you guys have hoses hooked up to outside faucets? Oh, better yet, if there’s an unfortunate next time (we hope not), come out with a fire extinguisher! Just thoughts.
You did handle it well. And, yeah, curtains. Gads, sorry that you guys are dealing with crap like this.
kmilyun
The sound of a pump shot gun works well also. Seriously, I dunno how much longer we can take this crap without loosing our freakin minds! So far our seasonal lights have been red and blue provided by the boys and gals in blue LOL.
Bibliotekaren
If you’ve got one, that sounds good too.
Sorry you guys are dealing with this. I’ve lived in some sketchy neighborhoods, not this bad, and remember the extra energy it took just being “on guard”.
spiny tim
Did you hold your mag high left-handed cop style? That and a command voice will still the weenie-wagger’s ardor.
kmilyun
Yes sir I did. legal cell length too.
spiny tim
You are to be commended, sir.