Month: February 2007

Someone suggested this subject too me a bit back and I really never felt like doing it but here it is.

As some of you have picked up – I had several strokes a few years back. It is rather hard to explain what one is aware of or not aware of when at 46 year old they hear the words stroke coming from doctors mouths. I suppose it is good thing that I was not exactly on top of my game in the awareness department when all this was going on or I might have stressed out over it.

There are lots of sites that a I can information on strokes – from causes to recovery – but most end tipped toward the care giver side of the deal. The reason? Most stroke victims either end up with little notable long tern effects or have problems dealing with the basic skills required to post on the net. Just my opinion but it is mine. The same can be carried into how the world around me perception of me.

Here is what you might notice. The woman who posts gets off track or misses the point. She is not a regular poster – going days sometimes weeks without contributing to this site (blog, forum, etc.) . When she walks down the street she moves strangely somehow but I just can not put my finger on it. In conversations she comments on something we said mins ago. Can’t she pay attention? LOL I have heard em all really.

Here is what I am not suppose to notice. The look of relief on my partners face when I don’t fall when negotiating the steps somewhere. The whispers about how I am a bit odd overheard at meetings. The tone of distain in someones voice when they try to act like they do not think I am a lazy good for nothing because I no longer work. Or how some people no longer want to do things with me because I am not always able to jump up at the slightest notice and show up to do something. These are just some of the things I am not suppose to pay attention too.

What you do not notice. That every stupid thing I type is typed out much slower than I ever used to be. That everything I type is typed in Word first so the spell checker and grammar checker hopefully catch what my mind no longer can. Then you do not see me wondering which of the spellings offered up as correct might just be the right one. I mean really if I knew that in the first place I would have spelled it right the first time. A few months after my strokes I did not get to go many places, I could not stay awake very long, and everything was very confussing. I did not care that it might take eight hours to make a niffty post about some political thing or another. Now I am able to get out, everything is not as confusing, and I value my time more. All this from a person that used to be able to whip out a 2 inch thick report on the history of an area from the geologic, geographic, and anthropologic points of view from the beginning of the geologic record through the native american history and trade patterns to the modern land usage. I did this in 2 weeks to get 3 extra credits of college course work for a special studies project – just cause – cuz- 29 units of work was not enough that quarter.

You also will not be inside my head when my brain can not come up with a word, or a way to express a thought. Or when my brain forgets that my left side needs to move along with my right side. You will not be able to tell when I have just driven 30 extra miles to get home because after over 20 years I have forgotten how to get there. Maybe you can tell me why movies that I used to love now scare the heck out of me or why my old favorites are so boring now? Probably not. You also can not know how confusing it is when more that one thing is going on around me at the same time. How I can not longer follow things that require sequences. I have to check stuff off a list sometimes. I forget to eat a lot. It just never really crosses my mind anymore. So, if no one else is around all day – well I might not eat all day. The food is there – I just forget.

Well that is enough ranting for today about this subject. I am sure I had more to say but I really can not remember right now oh well . …

I wonder do any of you notice the different trends or give a rats hind end about them when it comes to the internet?

Forums are good for watching trends. Someone may post a subject that entices others to respond and the thread runs on becoming a top thread. Then all of a sudden people loose interest and the thread dies. Sometimes the initializer of the thread tries to keep it going – sort of a last gasp.

Flickr is another one that is fun to watch. I have never figured out what makes one photo more popular than another. I am not talking about the interestingness explore thing but just watching comments on photostreams. Sometimes a very nice shot will go unnoticed while a not so great shot gets tons of comments. One day it seems winter snow shots are hot, the next day it a spring flower. Myself, I just like having somewhere to put my photos up and hopefully get some honest feedback. This way I can improve my skills.

Blogs are another place that is fun to watch the trends. Some blogger really do blog about what is important to them. I elect myself judge and jury in this but I can tell by the way they write about the subject. Some blogs seem to pick a hot topic from the technorati tags and run with it. Usually they just rephrase and repeat others opinions adding nothing new. The blogs I like sometimes do a bit of both but are genuine – in my judge and jury opinion LOL

This brings me around to the point of all this stuff mulling about my pea brain. My little blog here is fun. There are a few regulars that I can see always stop by and see whats up on my sitemeter thingy. Now there are quite a few that come in via the Scoble and Thomas Hawk site links. They usually do not come back :). There were a few that buzzed in when I had my site linked in flickr – never to come back either. Now I have a new category – the people who used to come by and never do now – this category started when my blog was linked by Scobel. So what is up with that?

This judge and jury’s verdict is that I really do not have much of anything interesting to say. But, that is ok, I enjoy talking to myself.

Wow, there is something to be said about not having gone into downtown Sacramento at night for awhile.  Maybe it is just my inability to retain environmental factors lately but when did the illiumination of the tower bridge go RED? It is painted gold I know this – for sure. It really was interesting looking glowing red. It was eerie in a way driving over it and looking up out of the open window. I wonder if it was for Valentines day? Will it be green for St Patricks Day? I am so behind in the current downtown culture and night life too.  And I do not really care! Oh oh my mom warned me about this – I am old LOL!

Then there are the streets that use to end but now go through.  For years a drive straight down a street would lead to a forced right turn. Eh oh why did we end up here having to turn left? Duh – the street goes two blocks farther now. How much bigger can tree be in two years? Big enough to block that good shot you expected of the Capitol dome. When did they install the super bright lights on the walk? Why are there only homeless and drunk young people in the park? They were always there but mixed with other sorts of folks too. Where did all the other people go? The movie go-ers, the people out for an evening stroll? I do not remember feeling, well, scared as much down here- downtown.

Flickr Photo Sharing 

Lately my blog dashboard has been showing an incoming link from Get in the sac(to). Ok, a link emm . .. seems I am forbidden on that server. LOL What the heck. Wow I am so impressed I have been linked to by ??? who the heck knows. Probably one of those sites that republishes others blog posts . . .  not sure since I am an access denied type person. oh well, I have gotten in whatever it is!

Another rainy day around here. Did manage to spend a short time at the Elk Grove park. A few quick pictures and the rain cometh so I leavith. I joined another photo group, one that has just started up in Elk Grove. Just of few members but it looks like it might turn into something fun. We shall see.  Sometimes people just show up to a meet to get their networking in. Hopefully this will not turn into one of those deals. The people who showed up at the first meet and greet type deal seemed nice and interested in sharing knowledge back and forth.

I used my new tripod today. Yeah I can adjust the dang thing easily and it was sturdy. I need all the help I can get in the camera not shaking department.

Well, off to see what is up with other blogs and forums.